It has been a long while since I have been on here and needed to get somethings off my chest and mind. I have held a lot in since my ab almost three year ago, if I am counting right. I wrote down my thoughts about it one day and let my fiance read them, he would have been the babys daddy and it kinda helped but yet it didn't because I was hoping he would tell me how he felt and I even asked him but he didn't. One of the comments in there was that I wanted to have a baby at some point in time but I feel as if it is or never will be the right time. He told me, and this is pretty much where the conversation started and ened, "just let me know when you are ready and we will have a baby...but you have to give me some advanced notice."   Not quite sure what the advanced notice it but I just wanted his thoughts and feeling on it not just let me know when you are ready. I know he may not want to talk about it and he may not be ready but sometimes I need to talk about it and have no one to really talk to. I tried getting a hold of a friend who had an ab and we just are not able to get on the same page at this time and I really don't want to tell her about it right now and ruin her happy time of being pregnant. UGH  I just don't know what to do!

For those who read this thanks for letting me vent a bit.

Dear Blond, I don't know why, but most of the time it seems very difficult for men to discuss this. My ab was 27 years ago and my husband and I have only discussed it in the past year! His words were, "I try not to think about it."
I'm sorry you didn't get the response you needed...it would be great if you could talk with someone close by who has been through this. Have you checked www.optionline.org for a preg. resource center in your area? There you could no doubt find someone who would be able to listen and who could relate to you. Also, keep trying to talk with him. Try to be kind and don't get defensive...say just what you said here, that you need someone to talk to about it. He doesn't have to fix it, just listen. ?? Communication can be a tricky business, but it's worth all the effort we put into it. Men and women think and even hear differently...don't give up! God bless.