I was 13 weeks when i found out i was pregnant. I was not ready for it and i knew it. I should have been more careful and i wasn't. I went to the doctors and decided to have an abortion. It was something so diffucult to go thru. I don't regret my decision at all but the pain is still there. It all happened on March 17th and its been about a month and it is still so hard. I had no one to turn to because no one knew what was going on except for my boyfriend, and he at the moment thought that what i needed was space to heal. I hated him so much for it. I know i should have said something but i didn't. I talked to him a week ago about what i went thru and how i felt and feeling and all he did was listen, i wish i could have said something sooner maybe i wouldn't have felt so alone. The one good thing about all of this, is that i began to understand that no matter what you go thru, no matter what you do or say GOD is always there. I still cry and feel hurt in my heart and i dont know how to make it go away i just keep praying that God heals this pain inside and lets me get back to being me. At times i feel like that old me left the very moment my baby was ripped out of me. He stole my heart without ever meeting him, I pray that my baby always knows that i loved him and that i am always thinking of him. God knows my pain and i know that in time it will be okay. but i can't stop feeling alone even tho i know i always have the support from my boyfriend and more importantly, the support from GOD. How do you make the pain go away? When will it stop? and will i ever be me again? These are the questions i ask GOD and i just keep praying that these answers come to me soon because i dont want to feel this hurt anymore!

Dear LoveByYHWH,
Thank you for the honor of sharing your heart and your pain with us. By the way, I love your username, beautiful. I am praying for you sister. You are very brave to face what you are going through so soon after it happened. There is hope and there is help. It sounds like you already know personally Who your Help is, praise the Lord. Help is available for the process of healing, it is a process. Check out our resource page for info on abortion recovery support groups. It is worth attending one, if they are available in your area. Our heart healing comes through much prayer and spending time in God's Word and there is a more complete healing when you can go through this with other women that are hurting as well. The group I went through is called "Beauty for Ashes" and there is another group that I am currently a co leader in called "Oil of Joy for Mourning", which we do in the prisons for the many hurting sisters there. This type of healing changed my life for the better after abortion. Don't give up.
You are loved and appreciated,
Nona

I FEEL YOUR PAIN AND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN US IS I REGRET IT.AND IF I COULD GET PAST THE REGRET MAYBE EVERYTHING ELSE WILL MOVE INTO PLACE. I CAN TRULY SAY WITHOUT GOD ON MY SIDE , I WOULD SURELY BE ALONE.I PRAY FOR HEALING FOR US ALL.AND THE PAIN IN YOUR HEART NEVER GOES AWAY ITS ONLY MASKED.GOD MAKES NO MISTAKES.AND REMEMBER HE NEVER BUT MORE ON US THAN WE CAN HANDLE.